Finding Leon

Another month, another hour, another moment when you see your life passes you by while all the rest moves to a slow but steady pace.

He woke up and realized that he didn’t dream. It was real after all. It went by and he didn’t even notice. He was too busy. He started making excuses to make himself feel better. There wasn’t anything left to do. It had already gone. He missed it and no matter how he thought of chasing after it, it can no longer be seen.

And so, he sat and waited for that door to open. He watched as shadows from outside moved about. He heard voices, undecipherable murmurs of people talking but still he did not stand up. He continued to watch the shadows moving and imagined them dancing. He pretended there was music and he began singing. No one could hear him so he sang louder. He sang until there wasn’t anything else to sing. It was 2 o’clock in the morning and he had forgotten about it. He sang because there was no one. He sang because he preferred that over crying. It didn’t come. Perhaps it had forgotten about him too.

He gazed outside and watched as the sun was rising. It felt warm and it reminded him of how that same warmth was what he yearned for. He wanted to say the words but the words didn’t come. He ran outside and chased the sunlight forgetting his sandals. He ran barefoot and felt that the grass was still wet from the rain the previous night. He ran in circles enjoying the cold morning and the warm sun hitting his face. He was happy – happier but he wanted more. He wanted to share his happiness to another; that one person to make the entire wait seem worth it. The one person to say it was alright to be himself. He was loved anyway.


He wanted to find him and say "Hi!"


Love letters and idealisms by Noel Abelardo